FLASH FICTION FRIDAY ~Beyond The Secret Door~

Posted: April 8, 2015 in dark, fiction, Outdoors, writing
Tags: , , , , , , ,

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Thank you to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for all her work and organization. You can visit her site and read through the other Flash Fiction postings at:

https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2015/04/08/10-april-2015/

For those who are new, Rochelle shares a photo prompt to which several #FridayFictioneers compose a 100-word flash of fiction. Come, see what lurks beyond the secret door.

Here’s my contribution:

Beyond The Secret Door

“When Marshal’s guys rolled the car back so the electrician could access the relay station underneath, some stones from the back wall collapsed in.”

Sheriff Shoemacher swung his finger like he was stealing a taste of cake batter. “Not that way.” The deputy climbed down into the 5-foot square hole which housed the circuitry. He directed his flashlight beam into a dark recess which traveled beneath the old Red Caboose Museum and platform on which the Sheriff was standing. “That way.”

Shoemacher circled to the far side of the hole. In the shadowy depths of the recess was a door.

jKb

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Comments
  1. Reads like a hook for a longer story. Could be a great mystery here. Nicely done.

  2. Lynda says:

    OK, I’m hooked. Will there be more?

  3. Mike says:

    Great opening for a story. Got me hooked.

  4. gahlearner says:

    Intriguing take on the prompt. I wonder what’s behind that door… And I absolutely loved: “..swung his finger like he was stealing a taste of cake batter.”

  5. Creatopath says:

    Loved the feel of this story and I’m intrigued to know what’s behind the secret door.

  6. Dave says:

    It’s where the beer cooler’s stored. ::sage nod::

  7. Oooo. a door..always an intrigue!

  8. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear JK,

    I love the way the story is really just the beginning. You set the stage and the hook all while leading us to the hidden door. Well done.

    Aloha,

    Doug

  9. Francesca Smith says:

    You have got me wondering!
    Good story, and I liked the line “swung his finger like he was stealing a taste of cake batter”. It made me chuckle.

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